Add It Up: Relationship Guide

Poza publicata in [ Naughty ]

For all you guys out therewho just cant figure it out, here it is: In the world of romance, one single ruleapplies: Make the woman happy. Do something she likes and you get points. Do something shedislikes and points are subtracted. You dont get any points for doing something sheexpects…Sorry, thats the way the game is played. Here is a guide to thepoint system. Simple Duties: You make the bed..+1
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pllows..0
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets..-1
You leave the toilet seat up..-5
You leave the toilet lid down..-10 after the lights are out..-30
You replace the toilet-paper roll when its empty..0
When the toilet-paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex..-1
When the Kleenex runs out you shuffle slowly to the next bathroom..-2
You go out to buy her spring-fresh extra-light panty liners with wings..+5
But return with beer ..-5
You check out a suspicious noise at night …0
You check out a suspicious noise and its nothing..0
You check out a suspicious noise and its something..+5
You pummel it with a six iron..+10
Its her father..-10 Social Engagements: You stay by her side the entire party..0
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college drinking buddy..-2
Named Tiffany..-4
Tiffany is a dancer..-6
Tiffany has implants..-8 Her Birthday: You take her out to dinner..0
You take her out to dinner and its not a sports bar ……+1
Okay, it is a sports bar..-2
And its all-you-can-eat night..-3
Its a sports bar, its all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your favorite team..-10 A Night Out With The Boys: Go out with a pal ..-5
And the pal is happily married ..-4
Or frighteningly single ..-7
And he drives a Mustang..-10
With a personalized license plate (GR8 N BED) ..-15 A Night Out: You take her to a movie..+2
You take her to a movie she likes..+4
You take her to a movie you hate..+6
You take her to a movie you like..-2
Its called DeathCop 3..-3
Which features cyborgs having sex..-9
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans ………-15 Your Physique: You develop a noticeable potbelly..-15
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it….+10
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to loose jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts ..-30
You say "I dont give a damn because you have one too"…-800 The Big Question: She asks, "Do I look fat?" ..-5
You hesitate in responding..-10
You reply, "Where?"..-35 Communication: When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression ..0
When she wants to talk, you listen, for over 30 minutes..+5
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV..+10
She realizes this is because youve fallen asleep..-20


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