Twas, the night before Christmas, and all through the house.

Not a creature was stirring, except for my mouse.



No kids lived with me, so I thought I would chatter.

Thered be no damn reindeer, and no stupid clatter.



Thered be no fat elf, coming through my chimney.

Ill be alone, my computer and me.



I wont race to the window, to see him arrive.

Ill just sit right here….. with windows ninety-five.



Theres no one I know, as Im surfing around.

None of my regular buddies are found.



I went in some chat rooms, but quickly got out.

Age, sex, location is all thats about.



As, I was about to go check out the net.

I got an E-mail which I didnt expect.



A lady told me, she had read my profile.

And, ask, if I might like to chat for a while.



She said, if I didnt, then she would just leave.

But, she was so lonely, on this Christmas Eve.



She said, its the first time, shed ever been on.

But, she heard, computers, could be so much fun.



She said, the computer, was usually locked tight.

But, she said, her husband, left it on… tonight.



Hes away on some business; Hell be gone all night.

So, she thought shed use it, I guess its all right.



She started to tell me, about her whole life.

How, she was expected to be a good wife.



She talked of her anger, frustrations, and needs.

Because, she was forced, to do such silly deeds.



She talked on and on, from one thing to the next.

Then finally told me…… she was oversexed.



She didnt have sex, with her husband, she told.

Hes always too busy, and getting too old.



Then, she wrote me something, that made my heart vex.

She asked me to teach her, to have cyber-sex.



I said, if she wanted me to, that I could.

Then after an hour, she got really good.



After five hours, my fingers were sore.

I told her, that I couldnt go anymore.



She said, that was fine, because she was tired too.

And anyway, her husband, soon would be due.



She said she would be on, the same time next year.

Then asked, if I wouldnt mind, meeting her here.



She said, only…. on this night, she could be found.

It is only…. this night, her husband leaves town.



She said bye, and signed off…..and I had to pause.

I think I just cybered……..with Mrs. Santa Claus!!!!