Ive known a number of people who told me that they were really
eager to have babies. Having a spouse or good job would be ok, too,
but what they were really after was the babies. I never understood
the attraction for a long time, but then it hit me. They must want
babies like I wanted a cat. (Until recently I lived in a dormitory,
where people of the furry persuasion are the subject of intense
discrimination.) Though I now understand the feelings of those who
have the unfulfilled cravings of the existence of another living
creature in the house, I feel it my duty to point out the flaws in
their reasoning.

Top 10 reasons why kittens are better than babies:

10. Veterinarians have evening hours.

9. Your kitten wont be able to disturb the whole movie theater with its
crying. Hell, you dont even have to take the kitten with you, and if
you dont, you dont event have to worry about whether or not the
sitter is available tonight.

8. Your kitten wont grow out of those cute but expensive clothes
within three months.

7. Kittens look cute if they havent had a bath this month.

6. You probably dont have to lie awake nights wondering how you are
going to finance your kittens college (or high school) education.

5. No one will accuse you of being an unfit mother if you dont want
to breast feed your kitten.

4. No one will accuse you of perversion or sexual abuse if you fondle
your kitten.

3. Dan Quayle cant accuse you of destroying the moral fabric of the
country if you arent married to the father of your kitten. In fact,
nobody will ever ask you if you know who the father is.

2. No one will question your abilities to function normally at your
job when they hear you just got a kitten.

And the Number 1 reason:

1. You only have to change a litter box once a day.