The parachute company says youll get a full refund.

They say the house didnt float very far at all.

Were all amazed that you go on living each day.

Well, at least the operation was a partial success.

The National Enquirer just loved those nude shots of you.

The insects hardly touched your other eyebrow.

With the lights dimmed, it looks almost normal.

The District Attorney sez he only has a few more questions.

At least the passenger side air bag inflated.

Jenny Jones wants you for this secret admirer show.

The reward for your capture has reached fifty thousand dollars.

At least we never thought you were guilty like that Jury did.

The insurance pays the full book value ($ 312) for your 1956 T Bird.

The thieves left the push lawn mower and hedge trimmers.

Those Grand Juries always over-react. Dont worry about it.

Lots of guys face multiple paternity suits.

The boss said while youre sick, hed do all your work personally.

MicroSofts Tech Support said those errors just arent possible.