Fellow goes to confession and tells the priest Father, Ive done something terrible. I just know theyre going to throw me out of the church for this one.

Hold, on, says the priest, what have you done thats so bad theyre going to throw you out of the church?

Yesterday, my wife was bent over a sack of potatoes and I looked at her ass and got so turned on I went lifted her skirt and had sex with her right there and then.

Theres nothing wrong with that, says the priest, youre allowed to have sex with your wife.

Why on earth would you think they would throw you out of the church for that?

Well, the man said, they threw us out of the grocery store.