Womens English:

Yes = No

No = Yes

Maybe = No

Im sorry = Youll be sorry

We need = I want

Its your decision = The correct decision should be obvious

by now Do what you want = You will pay for this later

We need to talk = I want to complain

Sure, go ahead = I dont want you to

Im not upset = Of course Im upset, you moron!

Youre so manly = You sweat a lot and you need to shave

Your certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you think about?

Be romantic, turn off the lights = I dont want you to see my flabby thighs

This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house

I want new curtains = And carpeting and furniture and wallpaper . . . .

Hang the picture there = NO! I mean hang it there!

I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep

Do you love me? = I am about to ask for something expensive

How much do you love me? = I did something today that you arent going to like

Ill be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.

Is my butt fat? = Tell me Im beautiful

Nothing = Everything

Everything = My PMS is acting up

Nothing really = Your such an ass hole



Mens English:

Im hungry = Im hungry

Im tired = Im tired

Do you want to go to a movie? = Id eventually like to have sex with you

Can I take you out for dinner? = Id eventually like to have sex with you

Can I call you sometime? = Id eventually like to have sex with you

May I have this dance? = Id eventually like to have sex with you

Nice dress = Nice cleavage

You look tense, let me give you a masssage = I want to fondle you

Whats wrong? = I guess sex tonight is out of the question

Im bored = Do you want to have sex tonight?

I love you = There I said it, Lets have sex now

I love you too = Now we have to have sex!

Lets talk = I am trying to prove to you that I am a deep person and maybe then youll have sex with me

Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys.