05
Aug
If youre a bear
If youre a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. I could deal with that.
Before you hibernate, youre supposed to eat yourself stupid. I could deal with that, too.
If youre a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too. I could deal with that.
If youre a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.
I wanna be a bear.