How many Princeton students does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two – one to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician.

How many Brown students does it take to change a lightbulb?

Eleven – one to change the lightbulb and ten to share the experience.

How many Dartmouth students does it take to change a lightbulb?

None – Hanover doesnt have electricity.

How many Cornell students does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two – One to change the lightbulb and one to crack under the pressure.

How many Penn students does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one, but he gets six credits for it.

How many Columbia students does it take to change a lightbulb?

Seventy-six – one to change the lightbulb, fifty to protest the lightbulbs right to not change, and twenty-five to hold a counter-protest.

How many Yale students does it take to change a lightbulb?

None – New Haven looks better in the dark.

How many Harvard students does it take to change a lightbulb?

One – he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.