Why PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE

One of the people has freckles and so he finds somebody else who has freckles too.

No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell .. Thats why perfume and deodorant are so popular.

I think youre supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but the rest of it isnt supposed to be so painful.

ON WHAT FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE

Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life.

If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I dont want to do it. It takes too long.

ON THE ROLE OF BEAUTY AND HANDSOMENESS IN LOVE

If you want to be loved by somebody who isnt already in your family, it doesnt hurt to be beautiful.

It isnt always just how you look. Look at me. Im handsome like anything and I havent got anybody to marry me yet.

Beauty is skin deep. But how rich you are can last a long time.

REFLECTIONS ON THE NATURE OF LOVE

Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too.

HOW DO PEOPLE IN LOVE TYPICALLY BEHAVE?

Mooshy .. like puppy dogs .. except puppy dogs dont wag their tails nearly as much.

When a person gets kissed for the first time, they fall down and they dont get up for at least an hour.

All of a sudden, the people get movies fever so they can sit together in the dark.

CONCERNING WHY LOVERS OFTEN HOLD HANDS

They want to make sure their rings dont fall off because they paid good money for them.

They are just practicing for when they might have to walk down the aisle someday and do the holy matchimony thing.

CONFIDENTIAL OPINIONS ABOUT LOVE

Im in favor of love as long as it doesnt happen when Dinosaurs is on television.

Love is foolish .. but I still might try it sometime.

Yesterday I kissed a girl in a private place .. We were behind a tree.

Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me.

Im not rushing into being in love. Im finding fourth grade hard enough.

THE PERSONAL QUALITIES YOU NEED TO HAVE IN ORDER TO BE GOOD LOVER

Sensitivity dont hurt.

One of you should know how to write a check. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills.

SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU

Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores.

Shake your hips and hope for the best.

Yell out that you love them at the top of your lungs .. and dont worry if their parents are right there.

Dont do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention aint the same thing as love.

One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure its something she likes to eat. French fries usually works for me.

HOW CAN YOU TELL IF TWO ADULTS EATING DINNER AT A RESTAURANT ARE IN LOVE?

Just see if the man picks up the check. Thats how you can tell if hes in love.

Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get cold.. Other people care more about the food.

Romantic adults usually are all dressed up, so if they are just wearing jeans it might mean they used to go out or they just broke up.

See if the man has lipstick on his face.

Its love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because its just like how their hearts are — on fire.

WHAT MOST PEOPLE ARE THINKING WHEN THEY SAY I LOVE YOU

The person is thinking: Yeah, I really do love him. But I hope he showers at least once a day.

Some lovers might be real nervous, so they are glad that they finally got it out and said it and now they can go eat.

HOW WAS KISSING INVENTED?

I know one reason that kissing was created. It makes you feel warm all over, and they didnt always have electric heat or fireplaces or even stoves in their houses.

HOW A PERSON LEARNS TO KISS

You can have a big rehearsal with your Barbie and Ken dolls.

You learn it right on the spot when the gooshy feelings get the best of you.

It might help to watch soap operas all day.

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

When theyre rich.

Its never okay to kiss a boy. They always slobber all over you. Thats why I stopped doing it.

If its your mother, you can kiss her anytime. But if its a new person, you have to ask permission.

I look at kissing like this: Kissing is fine if you like it, but its a free country and nobody should be forced to do it.

HOW TO MAKE LOVE ENDURE

Spend most of your time loving instead of going to work.

Dont forget your wifes name .. That will mess up the love.

Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out the trash.

Dont say you love somebody and then change your mind .. Love isnt like picking what movie you want to watch.