Questions about love, marriage and sex were posed to kids ages 5 to 10. Their answers below are enlightening:

What is the proper age to get married?
Eighty-four! Because at that age, you dont have to work anymore, and you can spend all your time loving each other in your bedroom.
(Judy, 8)
Once Im done with kindergarten, Im going to find me a wife!
(Tom, 5)


What do most people do on a date?
On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
(Mike, 10)

When is it okay to kiss someone?
You should never kiss a girl unless you have enough bucks to buy her a big ring and her own VCR, cause shell want to have videos of the wedding.
(Jim, 10)
Never kiss in front of other people. Its a big embarrassing thing if anybody sees you. But if nobody sees you, I might be willing to try it with a handsome boy, but just for a few hours.
(Kally, 9)


The Great Debate: Is it better to be single or married?
Its better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need somebody to clean up after them!
(Lynette, 9)
It gives me a headache to think about that stuff. Im just a kid. I dont need that kind of trouble.
(Kenny, 7)


Concerning why love happens between two particular people
No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell. Thats why perfume and deodorant are so popular.
(Jan, 9)
I think youre supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but the rest of it isnt supposed to be so painful.
(Harlen, 8)


On what falling in love is like
Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life.
(Roger, 9)
If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I dont want to do it. It takes too long.
(Leo, 7)


On the role of good looks in love
If you want to be loved by somebody who isnt already in your family, it doesnt hurt to be beautiful.
(Jeanne, 8)
It isnt always just how you look. Look at me. Im handsome like anything and I havent got anybody to marry me yet.
(Gary, 7)

Beauty is skin deep. But how rich you are can last a long time.
(Christine, 9)


Concerning why lovers often hold hands
They want to make sure their rings dont fall off because they paid good money for them.
(Dave, 8)

Confidential opinions about love
Im in favor of love as long as it doesnt happen when The Simpsons is on television.
(Anita, 6)
Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I have been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me.
(Bobby, 8)

Im not rushing into being in love. Im finding fourth grade hard enough.
(Regina, 10)


The personal qualities necessary to be a good lover
One of you should know how to write a check. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills.
(Ava, 8)

Some surefire ways to make a person fall in love with you
Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores.
(Del, 6)
Dont do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention aint the same thing as love.
(Alonzo, 9)

One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure its something she likes to eat. French fries usually works for me.
(Bart, 9)


How can you tell if two adults eating dinner at a restaurant are in love
Just see if the man picks up the check. Thats how you can tell if hes in love.
(John, 9)
Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get cold. Other people care more about the food.
(Brad, 8)

Its love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because its just like how their hearts are…on fire.
(Christine, 9)


What most people are thinking when they say I love you
The person is thinking: Yeah, I really do love him. But I hope he showers at least once a day.
(Michelle, 9)

How a person learns to kiss
You learn it right on the spot when the gooshy feelings get the best of you.
(Doug, 7)
It might help to watch soap operas all day.
(Carin, 9)


When is it okay to kiss someone?
Its never okay to kiss a boy. They always slobber all over you…Thats why I stopped doing it.
(Jean, 10)

How to make love endure
Spend most of your time loving instead of going to work.
(Tom, 7)
Dont forget your wifes name…That will mess up the love.
(Roger, 8)

Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out the trash.
(Randy, 8)