New and unabridged

The Washington Posts Style Invitational asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

  • Foreploy:
    any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of obtaining sex.
  • Doltergeist:
    a spirit that decides to haunt someplace stupid, such as your septic tank.
  • Giraffiti:
    vandalism spray-painted very, very high, such as the famous Surrender Dorothy on the Beltway overpass.
  • Sarchasm:
    the gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient who doesnt get it.
  • Impotience:
    eager anticipation by men awaiting their Viagra prescription.
  • Reintarnation:
    coming back to life as a hillbilly.
  • DIOS:
    the one true operating system.
  • Inoculatte:
    to take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
  • Hipatitis:
    terminal coolness.
  • Taterfamilias:
    the head of the Potato Head family.
  • Osteopornosis:
    a degenerate disease.
  • Karmageddon:
    Its like, when everybody is sending off all these like really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and its like a serious bummer.
  • Hindkerchief:
    really expensive toilet paper; toilet paper at Buckingham palace.
  • Deifenestration:
    to throw all talk of God out the window.
  • Acme:
    a generic skin disease (alt: the *best* skin disease).

  • Dopeler effect:
    the tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

Joke found on http://www.huumor.com

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