Paddy and Bridget had just got married. It was their wedding night in the bridal suite. Bridget was lying on her back on the bed in an incredible shimmering silky neglige whimpering Take me Paddy, take me now.

Paddy (having been a good catholic boy) was a virgin and didnt have the faintest idea what to do next.

Suddenly he had a brilliant idea. He dashed out of the room and went to reception to ring his mum for advice.

Her advice was to put the hardest part of his body into where Bridget wees. Paddy was a bit dubious about this but his mother assured him that Bridget would love it.

Paddy came back in to the bedroom triumphantly, asked Bridget if she was ready.

Bridget shouted, Yes, Yes, Im ready and then watched in amazement as Paddy ran into the bathroom and put his head down the toilet.