This old couple were celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary at a dinner sponsored by their family and friends. Just before they were to walk up and take their seats at the head table, the husband pulls his wife aside and tells her; Its been a wonderful 50 years, you have been a wonderful wife and a wonderful mother to our children. No regrets.

Then she says; Yes, it has been a wonderful 50 years, you have been a wonderful husband, and a wonderful father to our children, and I only have two regrets.

Whereupon the husband throws up his hands and asks What, what?.

She replies that for 50 years, when ever we have had sex, you have always been on top; and the second is that for 50 years you have picked your nose.

The husband says I can explain, I can explain. When I left the old country, my father took me aside and told me… Son, whatever you do, keep your nose clean, and never fuck up.