Did you hear about the Newfie Who thought nipples were Japanese children?

Did you hear about the Newfie who took a course in exotic lovemaking and announced that hed never be able to face his girl again?

Did you hear about the nurse they thought had drowned until they found her under the doc?

Did you hear about the perverted australian who left his wife and returned to Sydney?

Did you hear about the pessimistic historian whose latest book has chapter headings that read World War One, World War Two and Watch This Space?

Did you hear about the procedure whereby a Nobel Prize winner furnishes sperm for artificial-insemination purposes that is referred to as A STROKE OF GENIUS?

Did you hear about the real smart girl who could play post-office all night without getting any mail in her box?

Did you hear about the recent cigarette survey that disclosed that 99% of the men who have tried Camels have gone back to women?

Did you hear about the rumor that an FBI agent who was given task of shadowing a gay liberation leader has been summarily dismissed because he blew his assignment?

Did you hear about the rumor that Disneyland plans to promote a bumper sticker reading, DO A MOUSE A FAVOR: EAT A PUSSY!

Did you hear about the rumor that the vatican is freezing flavored holy water and selling the product as Popesicles?

Did you hear about the rumor that Walt Disney Productions is going to remake Beaver Valley as a skin flick?

Did you hear about the unreconstructed male supremacist who said that if all the womens lib. activists were laid end to end, that it would be the best thing that could happen to them?

Did you hear about the woman who got out of a taxi, and charged the driver five bucks?

Did you hear that a new airline linking Geneva with Milan, Rome and Naples is to be called Genitalia?

Did you hear that A voyeurs liberation front is being organized and their slogan is Power To The Peephole?

Did you hear that anal sex is a bum trip.

Did you hear that She was a farmers daughter but she couldnt keep her calves together?

Did you hear that some independent skin-flick producers are combining to form a major studio to be known as 20th Century-Fux?

Did you hear that The fastest four-handed game in the world is when it slips out?

Did you hear that The Masters and Johnson Clinic may well be the only organization in the world from which a man resigns when be becomes a member in good standing?

Did you hear that The only thing worse than coming home with lipstick on your collar is being caught with leg make-up on your ears?

Did you hear that the Popes next pronouncement on birth control is to be titled Pauls Epistle to the Fallopians?

Did you hear that the vote on a bill to legalize bisexuality could go either way?

Did you hear that those new edible candy pants are about to be distributed in a male version – with nuts of course?

Did you hear The report that the leading manufacturer of imported vibrators is a Japanese firm that now calls itself Genital Electric?

Did you hear You can make it illegal, but cant make it unpopular?

Finger fun is called MASTER-bation because anyone old enough to take things in hand can master it.

Happiness is inviting a chick to hit the feathers and hearing her say shell be tickled pink.

He took a shine to her stuff … so she polished him off in a hurry.