God summons Pat Buchanan, Nelson Mandela and Shimon Peres. He promises to grant each of them one wish.

Mandela says, Id like all of the black people in America who aredescendants of slaves to return to their African homeland.

No problem, answers God.

Peres says, I want all of the Jews in the Diaspora to come to the Land of Israel and make it their home.

Its done, says God. Pat, youre next. Whats your wish?

Buchanan looks around at Mandela and Peres and asks God, Did those two guys really get their wishes?

Of course, says God.

Well in that case, says Buchanan, just gimme a Diet Coke.