So, there are these two pirates talking in this bar. Ones got a wooden leg and a hook and even a patch too. The other ones just got the pirate clothes. So the second pirate says to the first, howd ya get that wooden leg mate?.

The first reply’s arrr, it done got bit off bye a varmint shark.

The second pirate is of course impressed, aye, dats really a pirate ting to have happen. Howd ya get dat metal hook?

The first reply’s lost err in a sword fight, bastard cut off me bloody hand!.

Aye, dats really a pirate ting to have happen says the second pirate, again impressed.

Howd ya get dat patch on your eye?.

Well I was up in the crows nest eh, and I looked up to spy this seagull says the pirates pirate, and the damn ting shit right in me eye. In disbelief the second pirate says

Well, howd dat make ya blind?

The first pirate replied: Arr…first day wit me ook.