01
Nov

Puns by the Pound!

Q: what did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?

A: Hold on to your nuts, this aint no ordinary blow-job…

Q: Did you hear about the queer burglar?

A: He couldnt blow the safe do he went down on the elevator…

Q: Why is it so groovy to be a test tube baby?

A: Because you get a womb with a view…

Q: Why are eggs so frusterated?

A: Because they only get laid once, they only get eaten once, and youve gotta boil them to get them hard…

Q: Where do you get virgin wool?

A: From ugly sheep…

Q: What did Adam say to Eve?

A: Stand back, I dont know how big this thing gets…

Q: Did you hear about the deaf gynecoligist?

A: He had to learn how to read ilps…

Q: Why are chickens so ugly?

A: Youd be ugly too if you had a pecker hanging out your forehead…

Q: Why do hummingbirds hum?

A: Cause they dont know the words…

Q: Where are an elephants sex organs?

A: In his feet- if he steps on you youre fucked…

Q: How do you tell if a woman is wearing pantyhose?

A: If she farts, her ankles will swell…

Q: Whats the ulitmate rejection?

A: When youre masturbating and your hand falls asleep…

Q: How do you know when an elephants been fucking in your garage?

A: Your Hefty bags are missing…

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