What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel.
–Frank Adams

A study of economics usually reveals that the best time to buy anything is last year.
–Marty Allen

Money, it turned out, was exactly like sex. You thought of nothing else if you didnt have it and thought of other things if you did.
–James Baldwin

I hope I dont sound like an old-fashioned stick-in-the-mud, but when I hear about people making vast fortunes without doing any productive work or contributing anything to society, my reaction is: How can I get in on
that? –Dave Barry

Credit cards are VERY dangerous. Every time I try to use one somebody starts chasing me with scissors. –J. Bothne

Many speak the truth when they say that they despise riches, but they mean the riches possessed by other men.
–Charles Caleb Colton

Happiness cant buy money. –Bob Hope

Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors, and miss.

–Lazarus Long Time Enough For Love

We survived the 1980s. Back then, the economic program was
called trickle down. That actually meant they were pissing
on you. How the whole theory goes was this: We have all the
money. If we drop some, its yours. Go for it. –Bill Maher

If the nations economists were laid end to end, they would point in all directions.
–Arthur H. Motley

Certainly there are things in life that money cant buy, but its very funny — Did you ever try buying then without money?
–Ogden Nash

In spite of the cost of living, its still popular.
–Kathy Norris

The wages of sin are death, but after taxes are taken out, its just a tired feeling.
–Paula Poundstone

Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is really quite as satisfying as an income tax refund.
–F. J. Raymond

Money cant buy happiness but it will get you a better class of memories.
–Ronald Reagan

Nuclear physics is much easier than tax law. Its rational
and always works the same way. –Jerold Rochwald

The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has.
–Will Rogers

A criminal is a person with predatory instincts who has not sufficient capital to form a corporation. –Howard Scott

The breakfast of champions is not cereal, its the opposition. –Nick Seitz

My mistake was buying stock in the company. Now Im worried
about the lousy work Im turning out. –Marvin Townsend

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
–Mark Twain

Im opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the same opportunity.
–Mark Twain

If you think nobody cares if youre alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
–Earl Wilson

Ive got all the money Ill ever need if I die by four oclock.
–Henny Youngman

If poverty is a blessing in disguise, the disguise is perfect. –Henny Youngman

Budget: A method for going broke methodically.
–Unknown

A budget is just a method of worrying before you spend money, as well as afterward.
–Unknown

Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math.
–Unknown

Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose your job. These economic downturns are very difficult to predict, but sophisticated econometric modeling houses like Data Resources and Chase Econometrics have successfully predicted 14 of the last 3 recessions.
–Unknown

While money cant buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
–Unknown

Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the
human intelligence long enough to get money from it. –Unknown