As soon as a woman thinks sufficiently fast, one calls it intuition. –Barbro Alving

We women talk too much, nevertheless we only say half of what we know. –Nancy Astor

If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infants life, she will choose to save the infants life without even considering if there are men on base. –Dave Barry

I heard a man say that brigands demand your money or your life, whereas women require both. –Samuel Butler

Do you know why God withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may love you instead of laugh at you. –Mrs. Patrick Campbell

The trouble with some women is they get all excited about nothing, and then they marry him. –Cher

Women want men, career, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love and cheap stockings that dont run. –Phyllis Diller

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax
and get used to the idea. –Robert A. Heinlein

Plain women know more about men than beautiful ones do. But beautiful women dont need to know about men. Its the men who have to know about beautiful women. –Katherine Hepburn

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps
they should live next door and just visit now and then. –Katherine Hepburn

A womans mind is cleaner than a mans. She changes it more
often. –Oliver Herford

Only two things are necessary to keep ones wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it. –Lyndon B. Johnson

You meet a lot of smart guys with stupid wives, but you almost never meet a smart woman with a stupid husband. –Erica Jong

Large increases in cost with questionable increases in performance can be tolerated only in race horses and women. –Lord Kelvin

On one issue at least, men and women agree; they both distrust women. –H.L. Mencken

I know Im not going to understand women. Ill never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.
–Jerry Seinfeld

If you want anything said, ask a man. If you want anything
done, ask a woman. –Margaret Thatcher

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. –Lana Turner

I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat. –Rebecca West, 1913

If women ran the world we wouldnt have wars, just
intense negotiations every 28 days. –Robin Williams

A woman never forgets her age once she decides what it is. –Unknown