Signs – some old, some new

Sign over a gynecologists office Dr. Jones, at your cervix.

At a military hospital-door to endoscopy: To expedite your visit, please back in

On a Plumbers truck: We repair what your husband fixed.

On the trucks of a local plumbing company: Dont sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.

Pizza Shop slogan: 7 days without pizza makes one weak.

At a tire shop in Milwaukee: Invite us to your next blowout.

Door of a plastic surgeons office: Hello. Can we pick your nose?

At a towing company: We dont charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.

On an electricians truck: Let us remove your shorts.

In a non-smoking area: If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.

On a maternity room door: Push. Push. Push.

At an optometrists office: If you dont see what youre looking for, youve come to the right place.

On a taxidermists window: We really know our stuff.

In a podiatrists office: Time wounds all heels.

On a fence: Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive.

At a car dealership: The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.

Outside a muffler shop: No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.

In a veterinarians waiting room: Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!

At the electric company: We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill. However, if you dont, you will be.

In a restaurant window: Dont stand there and be hungry. Come on in and get fed up.

In the front yard of a funeral home: Drive carefully. Well wait.

At a propane filling station: Tank heaven! for little grills.

And dont forget the sign at a Chicago radiator shop: Best place in town to take a leak.

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