02
Jul

Tech Support Questions

These are actual calls to Tech support help desks
(Some of you may find this funny while others could possibly use this section as a reference)
A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The tech asked her if she was running it under Windows. The woman then responded, No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his is working fine.
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Tech Support: How much free space do you have on your hard drive? Customer: Well, my wife likes to get up there on that Internet, and she downloaded ten hours of free space. Is that enough?
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Overheard in a computer shop: Customer: Id like a mouse mat, please. Salesperson: Certainly sir, weve got a large variety. Customer: But will they be compatible with my computer?
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I once received a fax with a note on the bottom to fax the document back to the sender when I was finished with it, because he needed to keep it.
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Customer: Can you copy the Internet for me on this diskette?
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I work for a local ISP. Frequently we receive phone calls that go something like this:Customer: Hi. Is this the Internet?
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Some people pay for their on-line services with checks made payable to The Internet.
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Customer: So thatll get me connected to the Internet, right?
Tech Support: Yeah.
Customer: And thats the latest version of the Internet, right?
Tech Support: Uhh…uh…uh…yeah.
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Tech Support: Ok Bob, lets press the control and escape keys at thesame time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen.Now type the letter P to bring up the Program Manager.
Customer: I dont have a P.
Tech Support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech Support: P on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: Im not going to do that!
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Customer: My computer crashed!
Tech Support: It crashed?
Customer: Yeah, it wont let me play my game.
Tech Support: All right, hit Control-Alt-Delete to reboot.
Customer: No, it didnt crash-it crashed.
Tech Support: Huh?
Customer: I crashed my game. Thats what I said before. Now it doesnt work.
Turned out, the user was playing Lunar Lander and crashed his spaceship.
Tech Support: Click on File, then New Game.
Customer: [pause] Wow! Howd you learn how to do that?

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