Log On……Make the barbie hotter



Log Off……Dont add any more wood



Monitor……Keeping an eye on the barbie



Download……Get the firewood off the ute



Floppy Disc……What you get lifting too much firewood at once



Window……What you shut when its cold



Screen……What you shut in the mozzie season



Byte……What mozzies do



Bit……What mozzies did



Mega Byte……What Townsville mozzies do



Chip……A bar snack



Micro Chip……Whats left in the bag after you have eaten the chips



Modem……What you did to the lawns



Dot Matrix……Old Dan Matrixs wife



Laptop……Where the cat sleeps



Software……Plastic knives and forks you get at Big Rooster



Hardware……Real stainless steel knives and forks from K Mart



Mouse……What eats the grain in the shed



Mainframe……What holds the shed up



Web……What spiders make



Web Site……The shed or under the verandah



Cursor……The old bloke that swears a lot



Search Engine……What you do when the ute wont go



Upgrade……A steep hill



Server……The person at the pub that brings out the counter lunch



Mail Server……The bloke at the pub that brings out the counter lunch



User……The neighbour who keeps borrowing things



Network……When you have to repair your fishing net



Internet……Complicated fish net repair method



Netscape……When fish manoeuvres out of reach of net



Online……When you get the laundry hung out



Off Line……When the pegs dont hold the washing up