The Statements Car Owners are Really Making

The Statements Car Owners are Really Making

Acura IntegraI have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars
Acura LegendIm too bland for German cars
Acura NSXI am impotent
Audi 90I enjoy putting out engine fires
Buick Park AvenueI am older than 34 of the 50 states
Cadillac EldoradoI am a very good Mary Kay salesman
Cadillac SevilleI am a pimp
Chevrolet CamaroI enjoy beating the hell out of people
Chevrolet ChevetteI like seeing peoples reactions when I tell them I have a Vette
Chevrolet CorvetteIm in a mid-life crisis
Chevrolet El CaminoI am leading a militia to overthrow the government
Chrysler CordobaI dig the rich Corinthian leather
Datsun 280ZI have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well
Dodge DartI teach third grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower
Dodge DaytonaI delivered pizza for four years to get this car
Ferrari TestarossaI am known to prematurely ejaculate
Ford Fairmont(See Dodge Dart)
Ford MustangI slow down to 85 in school zones
Ford Crown VictoriaI enjoy having people slow to 55mph and change lanes when I pull up behind them
Geo StormI will start the 11th grade in the fall.
Geo TrackerI will start the 12th grade in the fall.
Honda del SolI have always said, half a convertible is better than no convertible at all
Honda CivicI have just graduated and have no credit
Honda AccordI lack any originality and am basically a lemming.
Infiniti Q45I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.
Isuzu ImpulseI do not give a damn about J.D. Power or his reports.
Jaguar XJ6I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year.
Kia SephiaI learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu Corp.
Lamborghini CountachI only have one testicle
Lincoln Town CarI live for bingo and covered dish suppers
Mercury Grand Marquis(See above)
Mercedes 500SLI will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph
Mercedes 560SELI have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole
Mazda MiataI do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler
MGBI am dating a mechanic
Mitsubishi DiamanteI dont know what it means either
Nissan 300ZXI have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.
Oldsmobile CutlassI just stole this car and Im going to make a fortune off the parts
Peugeot 505 DieselI am on the EPAs Ten Most Wanted List
Plymouth NeonI sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena
Pontiac Trans AMI have a switchblade in my sock
Porsche 911 TurboI have a three inch thingie
Porsche 944I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me
Rolls Royce Silver ShadowI think Pat Buchannon is a tad bit too liberal
Saturn SC2(See Honda Civic)
Subaru LegacyI have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than Isuzu
Toyota CamryI am still in the closet
Volkswagen BeetleI still watch Partridge Family reruns
Volkswagen CabrioletI am out of the closet
Volkswagen JettaYou rule !!!!!!! (heh heh)
Volkswagen MicrobusI am tripping right now
Volvo 740 WagonI am frightened of my wife
Volkswagen CorradoI was tired of repair bills on my Porsche 944

(Source UNKNOWN)


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