19
May

There oughta be a law

I found the following bit of humor in the March 1995 Readers Digest. Do any of you have laws youd like to add to the list?

THERE OUGHTA BE A LAW

By Richard Johnson

It seems that we have laws for everything but the stuff that can really get on our nerves. For instance, there oughta be a law to protect citizens from the airline passenger who maintains his seat in a fully reclined position while an in-flight meal is being served. So I propose that we start passing some much-needed legislation to crack down on the following offenses:

RESISTING A REST: Repeatedly disrupting an entire row of patrons at a theater or sports event by heading for refreshments, frequent rest-room visits and leg-stretching.

EUPHONIOUS ASSAULT: Playing the car radio at ear-splitting volume so the next driver is blasted into the back seat.

LANE SHARKING: Parking over two spaces in a crowded lot so that the adjacent space is rendered useless.

COFFEE-RIGHT INFRINGEMENT: Hurry-up restaurant employees who are too quick to bring your bill at the end of a meal.

VIOLATION OF INDIVIDUAL SWIVEL RIGHTS: Rotating a circular merchandise rack while another shopper is browsing on the other side.

BREAKING AND EXITING: Slipping away after dropping a bottle of pancake syrup while in an empty grocery-store aisle.

SORRY I MISSED HIMMEANOR: Intentionally returning unwanted phone calls when you know the party who called will be out.

KIDYAPPING: Failure to get off the subject of your children.

POLY-GAMEY: Attempting to watch two televised football games and a tennis tournament simultaneously on a Sunday afternoon by means of rapid-fire, remote-control channel surfing.

LABOR FRAUD: Politicians who roll up their sleeves only when posing for campaign photographs.

Most viewed Jokes (20)