18
Dec

Tornado Research Grant Proposal

Thought Id pass along a grant proposal for important research. The following letter was received by the head meteorologist at the Miami, FL weather service office.

Dear Sir:

Last night, my 7 year-old son saw the movie Twister. He has abandoned his dreams of being a train engineer and wants to be a meteorologist. Needless to say he was determined to make an even better tornado studying machine. He wanted to empty his bank account to get a tornado sniffing dog.

I told him that the U.S. Government funded scientific research, and suggested he write for a grant. I thought you may enjoy his efforts, and I know that we would appreciate some kind of reply to his Grant Request.

Thank you for your time.

Dear Sirs:

I want to make an experiment to study tornadoes from the inside. I need a lot of money, so I am asking you for a Grant.

I will need these things:

1 helicopter
5 gallons of gas for the helicopter
5 pilots for the helicopter
1 stewardess to serve cokes
1 dog with a good sense of smell (not too big)
1 crash helmet for the dog
100 cameras
100 empty cans of coke (cut into little wings with a hole in the middle)
10 video cameras
1 Doppler radar
1 truck
1 camper lunch
2 computers (1 with pictures)
100 metal boxes for cameras (with a hole so the camera can see outside)
100 parachutes for the cameras
1 vacation for my family to Oklahoma and Kansas so we can find tornadoes

I think this will probably cost around $5000, so send me the money as soon as you can, so I can find a dog with a good sense of smell to sniff the tornadoes. I promised an old lady that we would bring her a video of the inside of a tornado, so I really need to get started.

Thank you,

Chaille

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