Mr. Brown: Give me a round trip ticket.

Agent: Where to?

Mr. Brown: Back here of course.

Mr. Brown: I put one over on the airline today.

Mr.Green: How?

Mr. Brown: I bought a return ticket, and Im not coming back.

Mr. Brown: Say stewardess, how high is this plane?

Stewardess: About 30,00 feet.

Mr. Brown: I see, how wide is it?

A: Wanna fly?

B: Sure.

A: OK, I will catch one for you.

If it werent for airplane schedules, wed never know if the planes were late.