Then: Long hair

Now: Longing for hair

Then: The perfect high

Now: The perfect high yield mutual fund

Then: KEG

Now: EKG

Then: Acid rock

Now: Acid reflux

Then: Moving to Calif. because its cool

Now: Moving to Calif. because its warm

Then: Growing pot

Now: Growing pot belly

Then: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor

Now: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor

Then: Seeds and stems

Now: Roughage

Then: Popping pills, smoking joints

Now: Popping joints

Then: Killer weed

Now: Weedkiller

Then: Hoping for a BMW

Now: Hoping for a BM

Then: The Grateful Dead

Now: Dr. Kevorkian

Then: Getting out to a new, hip joint

Now: Receiving a new hip joint

Then: Rolling Stones

Now: Kidney Stones

Then: Being called into the principals office

Now: Calling the principals office

Then: Screw the system

Now: Upgrade the system

Then: Peace sign

Now: Mercedes logo

Then: Parents begging you to get your hair cut

Now: Children begging you to get their heads shaved

Then: Taking acid

Now: Taking antacid

Then: Passing the drivers test

Now: Passing the vision test

Then: Whatever

Now: Depends