WEVE BEEN DATING.
Means: Sally and I have spent a least five evenings together, at least one of them has ended in sexual contact. Meanwhile, Ive also been dating Cindy, Louise and Carol.
SHES MY GIRLFRIEND.
Means: Sally has made me breakfast at her place many times. I have painted her living room and regularly change the oil in her car. We do not date other people. She is off-limits to my buddies, now and forever.
WE CUDDLED.
Means: Sally and I got into bed. We kissed some. She even laid on top of me. But nothing else. [Sigh].
LETS JUST SPEND A QUIET EVENING AT HOME.
Does NOT mean: Lets snuggle on the couch and listen to music and maybe sip some brandy. At some point, you will light candles and I will kiss you softly. We will make love tenderly, and I will tell you how much I adore you. Probably DOES mean: I think Ill boot up my computer and finally figure out Myst. Or you can make popcorn and well watch that really gory ER rerun.
SHES CUTE.
Means: She has nice tits.
SHES GORGEOUS.
Means: She has nice tits.
SHES ATTRACTIVE.
Means (when talking to other men): She has nice tits.

Means (when talking to a woman): She has nice tits but that would make you jealous so Ill say shes attractive.
I CLEANED MY APARTMENT.
Means: Its safe to go to my place because I stacked the papers in the corner and the dishes in the sink. I squeezed in the toilet bowl stuff, even under the rim, and I flushed.
IVE ONLY HAD A FEW BEERS.
Means: I have had more than one, but fewer than 50.
MORE FOREPLAY?
Means: More oral sex? Sure, I love oral sex.
I LIKE HER.
Means: I think Im falling in love but since I a talking to my buddies, I will use another term.
IM IN LOVE.
Means one of several things: 1) Sally has nice tits. 2) Im quite taken with the unusual way Sally uses her tongue. 3) Sally actually likes Mystery Science Theater 3000!