04
Dec

Windows 98, Brooklin Edition

(Forwarded by an American friend of Italian descent).

It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Brooklyn version of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside New York. If you have one of the Brooklyn editions you may need some help understanding the commands.

The Brooklyn edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen.
It reads WINDAS 98 with a background picture of the East River with a floating body. It is shipped with a NYPD BLUE screensaver.
Also note the Recycle Bin is labeled Garbitch
My Computer is called My Freakin Computer,
Dialup Networking is called Good Fellas,
Control Panel is known as the da Tote Board,
Hard Drive is referred to as da trunk, and …
Floppies are them little Freakin plastic disc tings.
Instead of an error message you get a winda covered with steel bars and Grafitti.

OTHER FEATURES:

WINDOWS 98WINDAS 98
OKdo it I tell ya
Cancelhell no
Resetdis is ya last chance
Yesa kay
Nona
Findturn dis place ova
Insertstick it in dere
Deleterub it out
Helpcan I get some help here
Stopya betta quit it
Startlets get a move on
Settingsda Fix
Programsstuff
Documentsstuff dat I already done

Also note that windas 98 does not recognize capital letters or punctuation marks.

Some programs that are exclusive to windas 98:

WINDAS 98WINDOWS 98
SecritaryA word processor
Pitcha makera Graphics program
Numberscalculator
Scratch papernotepad
Boom-boxCD player
Da WebMicrosoft Explorer
pitchasA graphics viewer
IRSM/S accounting software
IRS2M/S accounting software with hidden files
BookieRace track records tax records – usually an empty file
graffitiscreen saver
Red Light DistrictInternet connection
VinnisDiscount computer repairs

We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you received a copy of the Brooklyn edition. You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.

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