08
Dec

Xmas top ten signs youve eaten too much

Signs Youve Eaten Too Much

As presented on the 11/29/96 broadcast of LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN

  1. You ate the turkey, the pop-up thermometer and the plastic net
  2. Last thing you remember is positioning your open mouth behind a dump truck full of yams
  3. All your silverware is worn down to tiny stumps
  4. While picking your teeth, you dislodge an angry construction worker
  5. Strangers keep addressing you as Mr. President
  6. This morning, the display on your bathroom scale read Good Lord!
  7. You now have an ass the size of Plymouth Rock
  8. People keep looking at you and saying, I thought the Macys Parade was over
  9. Your relatives cant go home because theyre stuck in your gravitational field.
  10. Youre sweatin gravy, my friend!

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