12. Hey, wasnt your daughter a porn queen?

11. Im surprised you stopped me, Dunkin Donuts has a 3 for 1 special!

10. If I bend over, will I still get a ticket?

9. No, offi, offic, lucifer . . . Im not as think you are drunk I am. I swear to dog.

8. No, I dont know how fast I was going. The little needle stops at 110 mph.

7. Back off, Barney, Ive got a piece.

6. Want to race to the station, Sparky?

5. I know I was weaving, but I was trying to hit all the little green men!

4. On the way to the station lets get a six pack.

3. Youll never get those cuffs on me. . . You Homo!

2. Come on write the damn ticket, the bars close in 20 minutes!

1. No, YOU assume the position.