Old and New Jokes

A father and son went hunting together for the first time. The father said, Stay here and be very QUIET. Ill be across the field.An hour later, the father heard a bloodcurdling scream and ran back to his son. Whats wrong? the father asked. I told you to be quiet! The son answered, Look, I was quiet when the snake slithered across my feet. I was quiet when the bear breathed down my neck. I didnt move a muscle when the skunk climbed over my shoulder. I closed my eyes and held my
breath when the wasp stung me. I didnt cough when I swallowed the gnat. I didnt cuss or scratch when the poison oak started itching. But when the two chipmunks crawled up my pant legs and said, Should we eat them here or take them with us? Well, I guess I just panicked.