Ill tell you a short poem;

Ill try to make it quick.

The subject is quite simple:

The joy of having a dick.

Penises are super things;

You ladies should be jealous.

An organ surrounded by sensitive skin

Thats smooth and rarely hairless

It starts to grow dramatically,

When youre about thirteen.

Your testicles on either side;

Your willy in between.

It dangles neatly down below;

Soft, obedient and loyal.

At the slightest hint of lust,

Its ready to uncoil.

It often has a mind all of its own;

Its like a wild untamed beast.

It squirms and writhes and stretches out;

When you expect it least.

Sometimes, yes, it misbehaves;

Erecting when it shouldnt.

A bumpy train ride sets it off;

Just when you wish it wouldnt.

And during the summer,

wearing little, sunning on the beach

The slightest sight of shaking boobs

Makes it squirm just like a leech.

Handle it with love and care;

For it can give great pleasure.

Has it grown since last weekend?

And when did you last measure?

Some people fret about its size;

They give it lots of thought.

Is seven inches long enough?

It makes guys quite distraught.

They peek across in urinals,

To compare and try to see

But if another glances back at them

Theres no way they can pee

Masturbating is a sin;

Thats what some folk believe.

But those are just old wives tales;

Cuz it really can relieve.

Without this fabulous organ,

No shag would be complete.

Lesbians will try their best;

But must admit defeat.

It has to main bodily functions

Im sure youll all agree

To start a whole new life

And of course, daily to pee

But I think the thing thats marvellous;

About that one eyed brute

Is that when its trying to procreate,

It knows which fluid to shoot

And always it remains with you;

Until youre old and frail.

Dont take it out in public though,

Or youll be thrown in jail.

And so to summarise Id say with certainty

That every male loves his little friend

But girls, no matter what we do,

Please dont fold, spindle mutilate

And NEVER NEVER Bend!!!