The following is a verbatim quote of the opening paragraphs of a
(serious) article on the effect that Salman Rushdies book The
Satanic Verses is having on Britains Muslim community. The article
is by Jack OSullivan, and appeared in The Independent, a UK quality
national newspaper, on 5 Jan 1990.

A joke going around Bradford concerns two Muslims chatting in a halal
shop. The first says he has decided to take the Governments advice to
integrate and be like the British. Oh yes, replies his friend. And
how will you do that?

Im going to take my secretary to Paris for a dirty weekend, the
first man says.

But you dont have a secretary, the friend points out.

That doesnt matter, says the first. Ill take my wife and say
shes my secretary.