Heres a little clarification of corporate lingo.
SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE: Youll need it to replace three people who just left.
PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST: Youre walking into a company in perpetual chaos.
REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS: Youll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.
GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS: Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do.
IM EXTREMELY ADEPT AT ALL MANNER OF OFFICE ORGANIZATION:Ive used Microsoft Office.
IM HONEST, HARD-WORKING AND DEPENDABLE: I pilfer office supplies.
MY PERTINENT WORK EXPERIENCE INCLUDES: I hope you dont ask me about all the McJobs Ive had.
I TAKE PRIDE IN MY WORK: I blame others for my mistakes.
IM PERSONABLE: I give lots of unsolicited personal advice to co-workers.
IM EXTREMELY PROFESSIONAL: I carry a Day-Timer.
I AM ADAPTABLE: Ive changed jobs a lot.
I AM ON THE GO: Im never at my desk.
IM HIGHLY MOTIVATED TO SUCCEED: The minute I find a better job, Im outta there.
I LOOK FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU SOON: Like, Im gonna hold my breath waiting for your form letter thanking me for my interest and wishing me luck in my future career.
17
May
Additional Jokes From "Computer"
- What do nerds do in their spare time?
- An IBM acronym
- Lunch at Hewlett Packard
- The Dr. Seuss Computer Manual
- Bill Gates Dies in a Car accident.
- Redneck computer term
- Back In The Good Old Days
- Microsoft Darkness
- Computer Virus List 1
- Microsoft Bids to Acquire Catholic Church
- An IBM acronym
- Itty Bitty Machines
- Microsoft and ZZZZ
- Should my loved one be placed in an Assisted Computing Facility?
- Too Much Computer Time