Heart Attacks…Gods Revenge for Eating His Animal Friends

How many roads must a man travel down before he admits he is lost?

Im an imbecile and I vote

Money Isnt Everything… But it Sure Keeps the Kids In Touch

If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you!

100,000 sperm and YOU were the fastest?

Grow your own dope, plant a man

All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets

Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

BEER: Its not just for breakfast anymore.

I need someone really bad…Are you really bad?

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

All men are idiots…I married their king.

Reality is a crutch for people who cant cope with drugs

Dont drink and drive…You might hit a bump and spill it

We are born naked, wet, and hungry….Then things get worse.