You might be a redneck if…

Your Christmas cards have a copy of your butt included.

People are scared to touch your wifes bathrobe.

Your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.

You think a Volvo is part of a womans anatomy.

Youve ever worn shorts to a funeral home.

You think that the styrofoam cooler is the greatest invention of all time.

Youve ever been too drunk to fish.

Youve ever bought a used cap.

You had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.

Youve ever used a weedeater indoors.