* Buy a dog a toy and it will play with it forever. Buy a cat a present and it will play with the wrapper for 10 minutes.* Although cats are rather delicate creatures, and they are subject to a good many ailments, I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia.* Dogs and cats instinctively know the exact moment their owners will wake up. Then they wake them 10 minutes sooner.* Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.* Dogs shed, cats shred.* I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult?* No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.* I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.* Dont accept your dogs admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.* We wonder why the dogs always drink out of our toilets, but look at it from their point of view: Why do humans keep peeing into their water bowls?* Women and cats will do as they please…men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.* In order to keep a true perspective of ones importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.