Old and New Jokes

You see a bumper sticker that says Users are Losers and you
have no idea it is referring to drugs.
Your sleep schedule is similar to that of the great horned owl.
You make more than all of the MBAs you know who actually
finished college.
You have enough computing power in your house or apartment to
render obscene pictures of upper management people.
Your idea of a social event is going to a Non-Disclosure Discussion
The last time you wore a tie was your high school graduation.
The last time you kissed someone was in high school.
What? No raise? No Backups, then!
You have a vanity plate on your car that names part of the
Unix File System.
You have ever uttered the phrase I will be working from home
today so I can avoid wearing pants.