Old and New Jokes

One day a man has a terrible stomach complaint and goes along to see his doctor. The doctor tells him that he is very ill, but that he can cure his condition with a course of suppositories inserted deep into his rectum every 6 hours.



Right says the doctor, bend over and Ill do the first one for you. The man bends down and the doctor deposited the suppository. He then gives the man his course and sends him home.



At home 6 hours later the man realises that he cant stick the supposiory far enough up, by himself, so he asks his wife to help him insert the slippery bullet. After explaining to her what to do, the man bends over. His wife puts one hand on her husbands shoulder to brace herself and thrusts really hard. To her horror the man lets out a blood curdling scream.



My God she cries. Whats the matter? Did I hurt you?



No replies the man. But I have just realised that when the doctor did it, he had both hands on my shoulders.