See Rabbi Schwartz, Father Flanagan, and Master Yogi in a theological grudge match in the Steel Confessional of Death in Biblemania XIV!
That John 3:16 guy at the football game is now holding a sign saying Channel 5, right now!
The Weather Channel broadcasting 24-hour a day Ark Advisory.
Bearded guy in the window outside The Today Show keeps sending telepathic messages.
NBC starts plugging THOU SHALT SEE TV
That older gentleman announcing the new Fig Leaf Policy on the Playboy channel aint Hef.
At last, somebody smote those idiotic Mentos commercials!!
Guest on Entertainment Tonight squashes James Cameron like a bug, raises arms and exclaims, No, *Im* the king of the world!
MTVs Vatican Spring Break 98
Maximum possible Jeopardy score: $783,200. Contestant who looks like George Burns: $700,000 and climbing.
Flurry of white people sighted on UPN and WB networks.
Jerry Springer only gets out the words Today our topic is… before he bursts into flames.
For sixth straight day, Kenny G. live from Branson cancelled due to technical difficulties.
When Oprah says My next guest wrote his bestselling book thousands of years ago, and he hasnt been seen in public since, she aint talking about Salinger!
Your first two clues? Mohammed as sidekick and Buddha as bandleader.

and the Number 1 Sign God is Appearing on Your TV…

Normally standoffish Amish family from down the street drops by with a bundt cake and a bottle of Amaretto.

[ This list copyright 1998 by Chris White ]
[ The Top 5 List top5@gmbweb.com http://www.topfive.com ]
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Ruminations & Ponderances

I once thought that if I had all the money in the world, I would give some to my friends, but that would be pretty stupid, because then I wouldnt have all the money in the world anymore.

(Thanks to Sheryl Adsit)