You go to him for a separated shoulder, and he suggests you rub a croissant on the affected area three times a day

He tells you that your deodorant is giving you headaches and that you should take fewer showers

Insists on watching Jerry Lewis telethon tapes during open heart surgery

Prescribes butter, and plenty of it!

Fills your IV bag with Beaujolais Nouveau

Suggests radical brie implant

In the middle of your checkup, lets a German doctor bully his way into being your new primary care physician

Tells you to smoke two packs and call him in the morning

White lab coat embroidered with Pepe LePew holding caduceus symbol

Recommends surgery, you say no way, and he immediately surrenders

Skips out, leaves you to pay the check at a Vietnamese restaurant

Asks, So what I misdiagnosed you, monsieur? I work for the government and cannot ever be fired. Vive longtemps le médecine sociale!

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