Old and New Jokes

Ordering Earl Grey tea from the computer, then smacking himself on the forehead and saying I could have had a V-8!
Yelling Punchbuggy! and hitting Rikers arm whenever he sees a shuttle craft
Screwing around in the holodeck when he ought to be on the bridge
Spotlighting unsuspecting crew members with the glare from his forehead
Lecturing everybody on why its rude to fire the phasers at other life-forms
Sending crank subspace messages to Starfleet Command asking if Dick Hertz is there
Asking Beverly Crusher to come to his quarters so he can show her a REAL Picard Maneuver
Ticking off Romulan commanders during tense confrontations in the Neutral Zone by asking Are those Bugle Boy jeans youre wearing?
Telling crew members in menacing, Dirty Harry voice, Go ahead, Make it so
Putting banana peels on the transporter pads just before an away team beams back up