Old and New Jokes

Kansas: Toto isnt here anymore. Wisconsin: Wear cheese or die. Oklahoma: Rather Sooner than Later. Hawaii: Try our lei-away program. Mississippi: Elvis was born here, but heck, even he left. California: Hey, with this many of us, we can make it legal! New Jersey: Waste not … send it here instead. Nevada: Two to one youll come again! Washington: If wed meant DC, wed have said DC, stupid. Massachusetts: Taxus Por Un Fortunat Bums. Tennessee: To stay here, youd have to be a Volunteer! Alabama: At least youre not in Mississippi. Idaho: And dont even joke about the &%$#)%^ potatoes! West Virginia: Well, it sounded better than Eastern Ohio… Florida: Give me your sick, your old, your rich retirees… South Carolina: Settled by prisoners, what do you expect. North Carolina: Furniture out the wazoo. Maryland: The best place to get crabs. Nebraska: Not much to look at, but we sure have a lot of it. Alaska: Colder than a polar bears patoot. South Dakota: To rent this space call 1-800-SEE-COWS. Michigan: Where cars used to come from. Arkansas: Send us your contributions, well send you our Bill… Wyoming: More elk than people, but not much traffic. Delaware: Parking for Dupont employees only. Vermont: We boil sap. New Hampshire: We boil sap too. Ohio: The pillow state — round on both ends, hi in the middle — and full of fluff. Missouri: We love company … North Dakota: We wish we even had sap.