31
Dec

A Guide to U.S. Newspapers

The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.

The New York Times is read by people who think they run the
country.

The Washington Post is read by people who think they should run
the country.

USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the
country but dont really understand the Washington Post. They do,
however like the smog statistics shown in pie charts.

The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldnt mind running
the country, if they could spare the time, and if they didnt have to
leave L.A. to do it.

The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the
country.

The New York Daily News is read by people who arent too sure
whos running the country, and dont really care as long as they can
get a seat on the train.

The New York Post is read by people who dont care whos running
the country either, as long as they do something really scandalous,
preferably while intoxicated.

The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who arent sure
there is a country, or that anyone is running it; but whoever it is,
they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions
if the leaders are handicapped minority, feministic atheist dwarfs,
who also happen to be illegal aliens from any country or galaxy
as long as they are democrats.

The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another
country, but need the baseball scores.

Most viewed Jokes (20)