A blonde dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates, where she is greeted by St. Peter.
Welcome! he says. Because we are currently operating at 99% capacity, we can only let a limited number of souls into heaven. Therefore, you must answer my questions correctly to gain entrance.
Okay, says the blonde.
Heres your question: name two days of the week
that begin with the letter T.
Thats easy. Today and tomorrow!
Well, thats not the answer I was thinking of, but Ill give you another question. How many seconds are there in a year?
Thats easy. Twelve!
Twelve?
January second, February second, March second —
Okay, okay. I can see you misunderstood this question as well.
Well, Okay. Ill give you one more chance. Whats Gods name?
Thats easy. Ollie !
Ollie ?
You know — Our Father, who art in heaven, Ollie be thy name…