Hark the bar room voices sing

Out of tune and everything

Christmas time and lets go wild

Make the persian gulf look mild

Lets get drunk and all fall down

Take the car and speed thru town

Wrap yourself around a pole

Put your family on the dole

Hark the bar room voices scream

Pass the jug of irish cream

Get up early christmas dawn

Yawn the technicolor yawn

Kids are howling with delight

You were out too late last night

Even smiling hurts your head

Open gifts,go back to bed

Hark the bar room voices bark

Wheres the jug of cutty sark

Christmas comes home once a year

Dont you think you should be there

People love you, dont be jerky

Go home, eat some christmas turkey

Hug someone and then you say

Have a happy holiday