This joke was told to me this past weekend by Estil Vance, who probably
heard it from someone at Johns Hopkins Medical School.

A ventriloquist was driving through the midwest when his car broke down.
He walked a ways and found a farmer who would let him use his phone. Well,
the farmer seemed to be a real stereotypical rural type, so the ventriloquist
thought it would be possible to have some fun with him. The farmer began
to lead him back to the house.

Along the way, they passed a horse. The ventriloquist said to the farmer,
Is this your horse? The farmer replied, Yep. The ventriloquist asked,
Can he talk? The farmer said, Nope. The ventriloquist then said to the
horse, So, how do you like it here? He then threw his voice, and said in
a horse-like voice, Oh, its pretty good. Every morning the farmer feeds me
oats. Upon hearing this the farmer was startled and quickened his pace.

Soon they came to a cow. The ventriloquist asked, Is this your cow? and
the farmer replied, Yep. He then asked, Does it talk? and the farmer
replied, I..I dont think so. The ventriloquist asked the cow, How do you
like it here? and threw his voice again. In a cow-like voice, he said,
Oh, I like it just fine. Every morning the farmer comes and milks me.
Upon hearing this, the farmer squirmed. He looked down at the ground and
continued walking.

Soon they came to some sheep. The ventriloquist asked, Are these your
sheep? and the farmer replied, Yep. He then asked, Do they talk? and
the farmer exclaimed, Yes, but they lie!

Neil Weinstock