Johnny was, by all accounts, the worst eight year old kid on earth. He stole, lied, beat-up his sister, just about any trouble this kid could get into, he did. Nonetheless, Johnny wanted a bicycle for Christmas.

Johnny goes to his mother and demands, Mom, for Christmas, I want a bicycle! To this his mother replies, Yea, right, … Santas not comming to THIS house you little brat, youve stolen from all the neighbors, shoplifted, beat-up kids at school, youll be lucky if you even get a lump of coal.

Enraged, Johnny storms up to his room. After about an hour, he decides he will appeal his case to God. So he grabs a tablet and starts to write his letter to God.

Dear God, If I get a bicycle for Christmas, I will never steal again… No, that wont work. God will know Im lying. So he tears up this letter and starts again.

Dear God, If I get a bicycle for Christmas, Ill wash Moms dishes for all year… No, that wont work. God will know Im lying. So he tears up this letter and starts again.

Evenually, Johnny uses up the entire tablet and has only one sheet left but still no letter to God. Then it hits him. He runs out of the house and down to the church. In the church, he finds the Madona and snatches it, runs home, and hides it under the bed. Then he writes:

Dear God, If you ever want to see your mother again, have Santa Claus deliver a bicycle to my house on Christmas…