Elephant Jokes

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1. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants in the distance?

Look, a herd of elephants in the distance

2. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants with sunglasses

in the distance?

Nothing. He doesnt recognize them.

3. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of giraffes in the distance?

Haha! You fooled me once with those disguises, but not this time!

4. What is the difference between en elephant and a plum?

An elephant is grey.

5. What does Jane say when she sees a herd of elephants in the distance?

Look! A herd of plums in the distance (Jane is colorblind)

6. How do you get four elephants into a Mini?

Two in the front, two in the back.

7. What game do four elephants in a mini play?

Squash

8. How do you get an elephant into the fridge?

1. Open door.

2. Insert elephant.

3. Close door.

How do you get a giraffe into the fridge?

1. Open door.

2. Remove elephant.

3. Insert giraffe.

4. Close door.

9. How do you know there are *two* elephants in your fridge?

The door wont close.

10. How do you know there are *three* elephants in your fridge?

Therell be one waiting outside in the Mini.

11. How can you tell that an elephant has been in your fridge?

By the footprints in the butter.

12. How do you get an elephant out of the water?

Wet.

13. How do you get two elephants out of the water?

One by one.

14. Why do elephants live in herds?

To get a wholesale reduction on the shoes with yellow soles.

15. How do you smuggle an elephant across the border?

Put a slice of bread on each side, and call him lunch.

16. What do you do when an elephant comes through the window?

Swim for it…

17. What has two grey legs and two brown legs?

An elephant with diarrhea.

18. What do you give an elephant with diarrhea?

Lots of room!

19. Every nation has to write a book about the Elephant:

The French book – The Sex Life of the Elephant

or: 1000 ways to cook Elephant

The English book – Elephants I have shot on Safari

The Welsh book – The Elephant and its influence on Welsh language and

culture

or: Oes ysgol tocynnau eleffant llanfairpwll nhadau coeden.

The American book – How to Make Bigger And Better Elephants

The Japanese book – How to Make Smaller And Cheaper Elephants

The Greek book – How to Sell Elephants for a Lot of Money

The Finnish book – What Do Elephants Think about Finnish People

The German book – A Short Introduction to Elephants, Vol 1-6.

The Icelandic book – Defrosting an Elephant

The Swiss book – Switzerland: The Country Through Which Hannibal Went

With His Elephants

The Canadian book – Elephants: A Federal or State Issue?

The Swedish book – How to reduce your taxes with an elephant.

20. Hickory Dickory Dock,

An elephant ran up the clock,

The clock is being repaired.


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